Hello! Hello! My dear friends! Welcome back to another round of what goes through Derek’s head! 😂😂😂
Stop assuming friendship with people, because they don’t care. And, therefore, why should you?
Having friends is wonderful, especially those you can count on. However, there are some people who don’t value friendship or it just doesn’t mean the same to them as it does to you.
And, in my opinion, it is time to back away – detach as I discussed in a previous post. And if necessary, cut them loose altogether.
I know, I get it. As we grow older, our needs change. Our priorities change. We get “busier” or that is at least what we tell ourselves and others. We just don’t have the same time as we did when we were younger or our friendship circle changes.
However, when you have been friends with the same group of people for years and suddenly they don’t seem to have time for you when they are not that busy. Or you are not getting the phone calls – sorry – the text messages, you used to, time to ask what’s up?
And I also get that people just simply grow apart for whatever reason, because of time or distance or what have you.
I have also had friends who thought they could walk all over me, because they assumed friendship. And I stupidly allowed them to do it in the name of said, so-called friendship.
Try that shit now, and I can promise you you’ll get your feet cut off. 😂😂😂
But I digress. I am going to tell another one of my boring tales to give you an example of when I assumed friendship when I shouldn’t have. And believe me I have more than one story.
This tale is about — well, let’s just call the bitch — Mother Devereaux. Several of you arleady know the story. So I will, for once, try and make it brief. 😉
I moved in with Mother Devereaux back in the summer of 2019, and I thought it was going to be a wonderful experience. I thought and ASSUMED this person would be the perfect roommate, because of their easy-going demeanor. We had known each other for over 20 years.
Oh this is actually a gay man, by the way, but I like to call him Mother Devereaux because of Golden Girls. I won’t explain further, as you can Google it. 😉
Well, things got rocky during Christmas of 2019. You see, I went to see my parents and brother in D.C. that Christmas. And at that time, the movie The Irishman, starring my main man Robert De Niro, had just come out on Netflix. And I figured that holiday would be a perfect time to watch it since I would have plenty of free time.
So, I went to D.C. armed with Mother Devereaux’s Netflix password so I could watch Mr. De Niro. Now, mind you, she GAVE it to me upon moving in. And she never told me that I couldn’t use it elsewhere. Plus I was paying for half of the bill.
So, on Christmas Day, I settled down to watch, when I suddenly got a text from Mother Devereaux, asking if I had used his password to log into Netflix. I texted back saying, ‘why yes I did. I’m about to watch The Irishman.’ I thought nothing of it, because I ASSUMED that he was checking to make sure. However, it went downhill from there.
He texted back asking didn’t my parents have a Netflix account, and I responded with no. That is when he told me that he didn’t want me using his password unless it was in the apartment. And I texted back saying that I didn’t think it was a big deal, because when he gave me the password, I ASSUMED I could use it anywhere. He hadn’t made any stipulations.
And he texted back saying something along the lines of he didn’t want his information stolen since he had already been through identity theft twice, which I knew about. And that it was a no-no for me to use his password info anywhere else.
I was beginning to simmer at this point, though. I texted him telling him that I was going to make sure that before I left to return to Atlanta, that I would erase his password and login info out of the Netflix account at my parents’ house. However, he still didn’t want me to use it. Okay, and so this is when I got mad.
On Christmas Day 2019, I called Mother Devereaux, who was actually at work, and cussed her out.
I told her that my family are not thieves and that NOBODY in my family was about to steal anybody’s password or identity. And that I ASSUMED that after knowing each other for over 20 years, that you would know and trust me better than that.
Besides, as I stated above he hadn’t told me that I couldn’t use the damn password wherever, and I could log in anywhere I wanted to. If I was going to dole out my password and login info to my roommate (and I now have another one), I would have a stipulation that you can only use it in the apartment. Duh!!!
Needless to say, after I finished letting her have it, I hung up the phone. I ended up watching my movie. And when it was time to return to DumbLanta, I erased all of the info out of Netflix so , heaven forbid, my mother or father or brother would decide to STEAL someone’s identity!!!!!! I mean, after all I am related to a den of thieves. Rolling my eyes fiercely!
So, upon my return to this wasteland called Atlanta, I got my own Netflix account and other streaming services, which is what I should have done in the beginning. I know. I know. Lesson learned.
I stopped paying for his bullshit, including Netflix and Disney and a few other things, too. I was just going to pay my half of the utilities and the rent, obviously, and that was it.
And when you fuck with my Christmas, you fuck with me, and THAT is a no no!!! Bitch. Just ask another former roommate.
But anyway, my point is I ASSUMED friendship. And I realize what a mistake I made. You should always ASK and not ASSUME.
Because how many times – HOW MANY TIMES – have FORMER friends ASSUMED friendship with me and did things or told me things without ASKING??? So, I am putting the “blame” about the above situation on myself, as well.
Friendships can be a trip and a half without the Louis Vuitton luggage. However, if you feel that you cannot cope in dealing with said friendships, then online therapy may be the way to go. You can do this in the comfort of your own home without having to get in traffic to drive to an office. Check it out by clicking on the link below:
Well, that is it for today. I could go on and on AND on, on the subject of friendship. But we would be here all year.
At any rate, thank you for reading, and please join me the next time. In the meantime, please be safe and, as always, mentally well!
DEREK’S DISCLAIMER: I am not a medical professional, neither am I giving any medical or legal advice. If you are seeking help from a doctor or an attorney, please consult said professionals. These are my personal thoughts and feelings on the subjects discussed, and my blog is my own personal experiences and journey with mental imbalance. Thanking you in advance!
I do not own the copyright to any songs or videos listed here.
AFFILIATE DISCLAIMER: There are products on this page. By clicking on the links, you will be redirected to that page at no cost to you. However, I will receive compensation if you purchase something (which I hope you do 😊).
Photo attribution: Many thanks to Kitti Incendi-Haj, Rostyslav Savchyn, and Serhii Tyaglovsky.
